Feel Good Moment

You know when you start working out and you get going good for a month and then life takes over and you get busy and stop working out? Well, that was my story for a very long time. 5 years. I have a very "feel good moment" I want to write down to remember. 


Now no disrespect what so ever here, this is just for me to remember and for me to keep motivated. 


I started running with a friend for a while. We became really good and she pushed me to run miles I never thought I could. I ran my first 4 mile and 5 mile runs with her. Just having a running partner was awesome. Well about a month ago, finals hit and other stuff got in the way and she stopped running. I didn't have any excuses to stop running so I continued. Now, a month later, finals are over and life has slowed down for my friend so she started running with me again. I'm telling this story for this reason. We have ran twice together in the last few days and I've come such a long way. Today I ran 7 miles and she ran 3. While it's so awesome she is able to run again, I'm very pleased with what I've been able to do since she's been gone. Normally I would stop running and not do anything. And then, like my friend now has to do, I'd have to build myself back up to where I was. But I don't have to do that again. Because of my perseverance, commitment, goals, whatever you want to call it, I've continued to run and have become much better than I was a month ago. 


It was a moment that I needed. Something to prove to myself I'm still doing a good job. Especially in this season. With the holidays, it's been hard. I still get my workouts in, but I eat like crap. I'm not losing any weight but I'm not gaining any either. I haven't been pushing myself to go further/faster as much as I did when running with my friend, but I was still out doing something and doing that something has helped me. 


Every now and again, I need an eye opening moment so I can continue. Things start getting mundane and boring and it's very easy to stop. And then a month later, I'd start up again and repeat everything. But not this time. I've continued and I will continue. I am getting stronger and it sure feels amazing. As I was finishing up my last 2 miles today, I had a good conversation with myself. I've FINALLY started on my journey to who I want to become. This whole running thing is making me a better person. Physically and emotionally. 


I know I talk about this a lot, but after having my first baby, I became very depressed. I was a very angry, bitter person. I was always nagging and getting mad at my husband. I would get so mad at my baby who was so young. I can remember just screaming and hitting and feeling like crap. Feeling like nobody liked me, everyone was out to get me and to make my life miserable. I thought my husband thought every other girl out there was better than me and that he would leave me because of that. I was in a very, very dark place. I'm so blessed though to have my husband still with me after all the (insert curse word here) I put him through. And to have my daughter who is now 3 not remember anything. I was depressed until I had my eyes opened in 2010. I left my husband because "he was...he did...he...blah blah blah" I always blamed him. But after coming back after being gone for almost 2 months, things were better. Fast forward a year, we were blessed with our 2nd daughter. She is now 9 months old. I haven't been even close to as bad and as horrible as I was with my first. I've been able to enjoy her a 1,000 times more than I was able to with my first. BUT...I would still randomly slip into my depression. I would get after my oldest for silly things. I would yell so loud and was just never happy with her. I mean, I was....but I wasn't. Since I started running, I've slowly started getting happier. A complete happiness. I don't get after my oldest as much...still do...she's 3 and very busy/crazy. But I'm able to finally enjoy her. My husband and I are getting closer mainly because I'm not so jealous, accusing, whatever anymore. Another story to remember....With my husband, if we are out and I see a pretty girl, I would automatically assume he thought she was prettier. How high school, right? I know. But it's the truth. When we would meet friends and someone new was there, boy or girl, I was always intimidated and would never talk. It would take a few get together's to really feel I can be myself. If it was a girl...it would take a lot longer. But the other night, my husband and I went out and we met a friend and his new girlfriend. Normally, I wouldn't say anything and would have big letters across my forehead that said "B*I*T*C*H. (meaning me.) But we went out and I was laughing and messing around. I was myself. I feel so confident in every way that now I don't have a sign like that on my forehead anymore. I'm able to socialize better and communicate better. It's really awesome. I know in the past couple weeks I've sent texts to my sister and husband saying how great I feel and how I love feeling this way. AND that I love feeling pretty. Yes! I finally feel like I am pretty. I know how to do my hair and make up now and with me actually fitting into clothes and feeling good. I can remember before losing the weight and feeling good, there were more days than not that I would cry and cry because I didn't have anything that fit or that looked nice. I wouldn't go out because I looked fat. I would cry because I didn't want to go to church because I looked fat. I cried when going shopping because I couldn't find any clothes that fit me. Now when I go shopping, I cry because I don't have enough money to buy all the cute clothes I find. Ok, maybe I don't really cry about that but you get the point.

We took a few family photos the other day and when I saw this photo, I literally cried. (I cry a lot, huh?) But I cried because I finally liked the way I looked. Normally I would delete the picture and then not take anymore. But finally, I can have photos with my family and think that I look beautiful. What a great feeling. 


I challenge all who read this to start something. Get up, get off facebook/pinterest and do something for yourself. Speaking of facebook, I honestly feel that had a role in my depression. I would read my friend's status updates about how amazing this was they did with their family, how amazing their husband's are...blah you get the picture. I 100% dislike facebook and I think it's a complete waste of time. I think people abuse their rights of status updates and I wonder how many people just update to get attention, to show off, to feel better about their lives. Got off topic a bit, but I do challenge you with this new year, set some goals and KEEP THEM! Do something. I promise you, your life will get better. You will feel so much happier. I PROMISE! 

Another 5k?

It's true, I ran another 5k on December 17th and I'm just NOW getting to write about it.


My first 5k was October 22, 2011. I ran it in just over 31 minutes. Since then I have ran a 5k November 5th, November 24 and then my last on December 17th. My November 5th race was still right around 31 minutes. Then on Thanksgiving my time was 28 minutes! 


Coming into this race on December 17th, I had a goal of getting in the 25 minute range. I got 26 minutes and ONE SECOND!!! Gah! I was kind of REALLY bitter. I know it's an amazing personal record and I beat my last time by 2 minutes, but for some reason I was just kind of mad at myself. Don't ask why. It's silly, I know.


The race was the most intense race I've done. There were 500+ people!! I got a spot up by the starting spot. One of my last races I went to the back, only like 60 people there though, but trying to weave around everyone killed me. And since I had a goal of 25 minutes, I headed up front. When the man blew the horn everyone SPRINTED off. A guy was tripped in front of me and I had to jump to not kick his heels and trip myself. It was so insane starting. So many people! It was intense! The whole race I felt like I was sprinting. Every now and again I felt like I could pick up my pace, so I did. I felt really really good the whole time. At about the half mile left point, I began to get really cramp-y. I really wanted to pick up my pace and run as fast as I could, but I couldn't! As I crossed the finish line and then learned of my time, I got mad at myself for not running just a little faster! The whole day I was just beating myself up. Why didn't I just push a little harder. If I would have, I would have reached my goal. 


I think maybe it was a good learning experience for me. With this whole weight loss/getting into shape, I haven't really set any goals. But if I have, I've reached them with ease. Maybe the goal itself wasn't very hard to reach in the first place? Who knows. But everything changed this morning. I received an email from the people hosting the race, and in that email was the official race results. I opened the link not expecting to see anything interesting, but you know what I found?? Out of 345 girls I took 31st!!!! Seriously!?! I was soooo proud. So excited. I sent a text to some of  my family and had a bragging moment, sorry! But man! Really? Out of 345 girls I took 31st? WOW! And I took 11th out of 89 girls in my 20-29 age group. I had no idea I did that well. Now I'm beating myself up for beating myself up after the race! haha Just kidding. But I've learned to not do that. And just be proud of everything I do. 


I cannot express my emotions right now. Going from a fatty mom who didn't stick to any workout plans for 4 years, starting out not even being able to run a whole mile, now just 2 1/2 months later I am running a 26 minute 5k, a 7'50 minute mile and completing a 12k (7.5 miles). I can't believe it. It seriously just amazes me. And to tell the truth, I have no idea what is keeping me going. I've just made it into a habit now. I don't even think about it anymore. If I miss a day, I just feel horrible. I'm starting to do 2 workouts a day now because I'm hitting a plateau. I read somewhere that when you first start a workout, your body has to work really hard and after repeating the workout your body doesn't have to work as hard. I didn't think about that. Honestly, it makes total sense. But I figured if I ran this many miles per week, I'd keep losing. and I'm not. Running 4 miles isn't hard at all anymore. Running at a 9 minute per mile that is. So I need to get a little faster pace. (Speaking of 4 miles, I usually run the same amount each week. Mondays 4, Wednesdays 3, and Fridays 5 or 6. So I have ran a few 4 mile routes. My time is usually around 45 minutes. So this past Monday, I set out for my run and ended up finishing 10 minutes faster! It was awesome! 


Anyway, kind of got long winded. I am so proud of where I've come in just 2 1/2 months. I hope I can still be inspiring to those of you who read my updates. Anyone can do this. You have to just dig deep and remember why. Once you start seeing results or start running longer distances with out stopping, you will get a ton more motivation and keep going. I promise. That's what starting developing my running/working out into a habit. 

Fastest Mile!

Another week has come and gone. Insane!! Time is just flying! This week has been a strange week. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday morning it was overcast and rainy out. Rainy enough to not be able to run the roads by me with a stroller.

After my 12k run on Saturday, I tool Sunday off (I usually do anyway) And when Monday came around, it was so wet and puddles everywhere that I couldn't workout again. Tuesday came and it was still wet and rainy and I was feeling a little depressed. Getting a little cabin fever and needing to get out. So when Tanner got home around 3, I headed out to go run. My plan was to run to the mountain about 2 miles down the road, hike the mountain and run home. It's always been a goal of mine. I headed out and it was freezing cold and raining. I made it a mile and decided to turn around. It was lame-o! On my run back I decided to see how fast I could run the mile. Most my miles are over 10 minutes. I ran that mile in 7 minutes and 48 seconds. It was awesome! Something else I want to remember....after I went Sunday and Monday with no workout and then thinking I wasn't going to be able to get one in on Tuesday I honestly got scared that I would start gaining weight or losing endurance or just something bad would happen. I was beating myself up for not getting out when the rain did clear up for an hour or so on Monday or Tuesday morning. But the amazing thing is when I went out to run just those two miles on Tuesday....they were so extremely easy. EASY! I couldn't believe it. I was sure I had gained back those 16 pounds in those days off. But I didn't. (Silly, I know) But I have just worked so dang hard to get that weight off I would be devastated if they came back that fast. I know in reality they wouldn't, but still, it was a fear. And how wonderful it was to not gain that weight and still have my running. It was awesome.

12k

Yesterday was the big race. Before I start, I decided not to pay the $30 to run in the "official" 12k race but instead mapped out my run around Peoria. My parents live out there and they watched my girls so I could run. 


Well, going into the run knowing exactly what streets to run to and what not, I was really nervous. I grew up in Peoria and drove these streets a lot. After mapping the run, I sat and looked at the loop. I couldn't believe I was going to run that. It seemed a lot longer than I thought. Before running I didn't know the mile markers. Each street is a mile a part, same with the major avenues. I started getting REALLY intimidated! As I arrived to my parent's house I had a lot of thoughts running through my mind. Most of which where excuses not to run. (I'm really good at making excuses.) As I headed out the door and did my warm up I didn't feel any better. I just felt so overwhelmed. It seemed so unreal to me that me, this fatty mom (not so fatty anymore but that's how I still think of myself) who hasn't really worked out in 5 years was going to run SEVEN AND A HALF MILES!! SEVEN AND A HALF?!?! Oh my goodness. It was unreal. Well I got to my starting point, turned my music on, and headed out.  My run started at my parent's house and went east for 2.5 miles. I would then head north for a mile and then head back west for the 2.5 miles and made another loop around this neighborhood to make it 7.5 miles. Anyway, that first 2.5 miles was the intimidating part. I have had friends who lived down that way and driving there seemed far, as a teenager. And now I was going to run it!? The first mile is always the hardest. Getting the muscles warmed up and joints too. But before I knew it I was down 2.5 miles and made my way up the one mile north. (Here is a link to a map, not sure if it works but maybe if you saw the route it would make sense?) After finishing that 2.5 miles, it really all became easy. Easier I should say. I became more mentally tough and decided that I would finish this race. As I hit mile 5, I remember getting a really bad side cramp. I tried working it out as I ran but it didn't help. So I decided to stop running. As soon as I stopped running, my knees, ankles, shins, everything started to ache. I picked up my pace and the pain went away. I then knew I couldn't walk. Fast forward to the last mile. There were several points in that last mile where I kind of got emotional. I just couldn't believe what I've been able to transform myself into. For years I've struggled with my looks and insecurities and now I am RUNNING 7.5 miles. It was so amazing. I felt so proud of myself. Accomplished is a better word. Either way, I was doing something FINALLY. Finally doing what I said I was going to do. I've always had troubles with motivation to work out. I'd do something for a month and then completely stop. And so now, to have been able to lose the weight I have already and to be running the most I have ever ran in my life, I was so....unstoppable is the word that comes to mind. I ran faster. I sprinted that last mile. I felt AMAZING. When I finished I let out a big whoo-hoo and a few tears as I walked back to my parent's house. Man, that walk back HURT! haha Every muscle and joint ached so bad. But I busted out a few more fist pumps and who-rah's and walked inside my parent's house. I did it. I DID IT!!! I DID IT!!! No word can describe my feelings. I cannot believe I actually did it! I ran the 7.5 miles in an hour and 15 minutes. Average pace was 10 minutes a mile. 


I'm so motivated to continue and pursue that marathon! I know exactly what I need to do to get there and I cannot wait until I can write about my marathon run like I'm doing now with my 12k. CANNOT WAIT! 

Down 4!!

What a crazy week!! Starting out with workouts


Monday - ran 6 miles 59min
Tuesday - 2 mile hike
Wednesday - 5 mile bike ride (trying to change things up....don't want to get burnt out of running.)
Thursday - 2 mile hike
Friday - Resting for race
Saturday - 12k RACE!! (7.5 miles)


I'm so excited for what I have been able to accomplish in just 2 short months. When I first started I couldn't even run a mile without stopping! And now I'm running 6 with no breaks. It's incredible to see that change in just a little amount of time. It really motivates me. 


Want to know something else amazing?? Here's some background first to understand why it's amazing.


2007 I was married. I weighed 134lbs.
2008 I had a baby, I got up to 163 while pregnant. I lost most...but not all. I got to 140. 
Depression paid a visit and I didn't work out, and I gained weight. 
2010 - 145 pregnant #2. Got up to 175 with pregnancy. Lost some baby weight and stayed at 150. I had baby #2 in April 2011 and stayed 150lbs until I started running in October 2011. 
And after two months of working out I'm back down to......

I weighed in yesterday, and when I saw that number on the scale I CRIED! I felt incredible! INCREDIBLE!! I haven't weighed that for almost 5 years!!!!! Ahh! It's such a great feeling! I had been 138lbs for almost a whole month! It was devastating! I got discouraged for a while. I know in my last post I mentioned how frustrated I was. It was definitely motivating to step on the scale and see that number! I know there's more the lose, I seem to be holding more weight now in my midsection. Love handles, tummy. But I am really going to just soak in that number all I can. I love it! 


I have lost 16 pounds now. 16!! And do you know what?? I do eat candy and junk every now and again. I'm not the greatest eater and I still was able to get down to almost my goal weight! I'm shooting for 130...well..125 but realistically I'd be perfectly happy at 130. I wonder what would happen if I cut out that junk, AGAIN, would I lose more? I feel amazing. I enjoy my workouts and I look forward to them everyday! 


I am also extremely blessed with 2 awesome girls who sit through my runs in their stroller. Or sometimes they even fall asleep. But not once do I hear them cry or complain. They are awesome. I love them so much! 


Do you know what's cool? Now that I'm feeling better physically, everything else is going great as well. My house is cleaner, my family is happier, I'm not so lazy. It's great. 


Tomorrow is a big day for me. I'm running a 12k! 7.5 miles! If you'd ask me 3 months ago what I think about running a 12k...I'd just laugh and call you crazy. I'm not a runner. Never was. But now....I consider myself to be one. And when I first started running, thinking to myself, "hey let's train for a half marathon" I wanted to...but in all honesty, I didn't think it would happen. Really. So what's pushed me this far and so close to running a half? Well just the fact that every week I am running further. 6 miles last week...7.5 tomorrow. That to me is amazing. I don't add every week. Especially now that I'm getting to longer runs. And I'm switching out a run once a week for a bike ride, This is just so cool. I'm excited for how much I can run. And for how much I'm losing! Who would have thought? :)


( I have a secret mission to fit into my wedding dress! Anyone else? I have tried it on several times since having my first baby, and it doesn't fit. Still after losing 16 pounds and weighing what I did when I was married...still nothing. I will fit in it again. Let's set a goal of by the first of the new year, I will wear it.) 

First 6 Miler!

We took a trip to Utah last week and from that, I have gotten really behind on everything. For workout purposes, the week of Thanksgiving I ran 7 miles. Suck-y. But that's what happens on vacation. I ran once before we left and I tried to get a family 5k race on Thanksgiving morning. A few ran. And it was fun. I ran a 28 minute 5k. That's 4 minutes faster than my last 2! I was ecstatic! 


Anyway, life has kind of been a roller-coaster these last 2 weeks. With sick girls and emotions crazy, it's been hard. From the last time I updated til now. 


This last week I ran a total of 14 miles! Awesome, right? I had a big accomplishment last week as well. I ran my first 6 miles! Friday. With the stroller. It was pretty hard but something inside me just kept me going. I could hardly walk after finishing. But I did it! I ran it in 1 hour and 10 minutes. I used that run to decide if I want to do a 12k race this coming weekend. The only thing keeping me from doing it is the money. It's $30 but I am running another 5k on the 17th with some friends. And that was $20. These races are adding up! I might just do my own 12k. But I like the competitive feel of the race. Decisions. 


I've lost another pound. Getting ridiculous. I was hoping to be to 130 by now. But I'm not. It gets kind of frustrating. Especially when I know people who are dropping 30+ lbs in the same amount of time as me. But...I think they are cheating. haha HCG? I should probably not compare but man, I wish I could drop weight like that. Just a healthier way. 


Anyway, I'm feeling really good. Crazy to think that just two months ago I could barely run a mile and now I'm running 6 without stopping. It's awesome. Well that's all for now. I have an easy week this week. Possibly a 12k on Saturday...check back then :)

Week Overview

This was a challenging week. With my girls being sick, I didn't have much motivation to do much really. But I did get my workouts in...the eating part not so good. Kind of disappointed but I feel good knowing I still got my workouts in. 


Monday I ran 3 miles. Tuesday I did nothing. :( Hard day with my little baby. Wednesday was a 2.5 run. Thursday I hiked the mountain near by which was another 2.25 miles and then my big run on Friday was FIVE MILES! I ran the whole way without stopping. I felt amazing! 


Total week mileage ran.... 10.5 miles!! Insane! I feel so good. 


Last night Tanner and I were at Target trying to find some pants for our soon to be trip to Utah. I had bought a size 11 right after my birthday in October. They were getting pretty big on me so I thought I'd try to find some new ones. I tried a size 8 on and guess what?! They were big! I now wear a size 6!!! I have not worn a size 6 since high school. My senior year to be exact. That was 2004/2005. It felt amazing pulling those pants up and actually being able to button them! I was starting to lose motivation after this week. With the drama of sick kids, crazy busy time with photography and having to run with my girls. But....it's all good now that I can wear a size 6! (Every brand of jeans are different. I think I'm a 8/6 depending on the brand. But still! Better than an 11!) 

Week Is Half Over

Can you believe how fast time is flying?? Man! It's insane! My girls have had croup this week so it's been really long. I got a 3 mile run in on Monday night and missed yesterday's weights. My baby was crying pretty much all day so I sat and cuddled. This morning I did my 2.5 mile speed training run.

I always forget how good it feels to get my workouts in. I feel so accomplished and motivated when I run. I've been having a hard time running in the mornings. My muscles crap up and I just don't have the energy to really push hard and finish. I got some awesome advice from my brother. He told me when I wake up in the morning to take a hot shower and stretch. This will help warm up my muscles and be able to push harder on my runs. This morning's run was awesome. No cramps and I felt like I could go another mile! I am so excited about the next month or so. Just to see where I can go. Mainly see how many miles I can add to my daily runs.

Before and After

I took some photos of my "after" yesterday. My "after" meaning after a month of working out and after losing 10lbs. I'm pretty shocked by the results. What a huge difference only 10 pounds can make.


Before's are on the left...afters on the right :)


Before: 148
After: 138
                       

                           

                           

                         


Can you believe the difference?? I'm excited for another month of workouts! I'm half way to my goal weight! I know it's going to be harder to lose another 10 pounds now that I'm lifting weights and trying to get muscle mass. I'm not too worried anymore about the number on the scale. I want to feel good and that's most important! 




Total miles for November 7-12: 8.5! 

Why Run?

I've asked myself this several times in the last month. Why do I run? Well...with my history of depression, it is definitely helping me manage and over power depression. But why else? Is there more to it? Of course there is. The mere fact of when I was single and younger I was very active. I remember how it felt to get my butt kicked by my weight training teacher or my coach and how great it felt! I miss that feeling of getting my butt kicked. Today I ran my 2 mile run. It was a shorter run than usual but I would randomly sprint for as long as I could and then jog to recover. I had about .5 miles left and I was DEAD. DEAD!! I have forgotten how it feels to be that tired and that weak. And I loved it. I know I'm crazy. But if you too grew up with that feeling of getting your butt kicked in a workout (and enjoyed it) then maybe you understand where I'm coming from?

Today, as my house is totally silent, I sit and reflect on what I'm doing. Why run? To be completely honest, I feel like a failure. I feel like a fat mom with 2 beautiful blessings for children and a wonderful husband. And what about me? Maybe it's depression seeping in and I'm letting it control my emotions. But I really want to figure out why I want to run. I was thinking today...what is my ultimate goal? Running a marathon? That is 26 flippen miles! Holy heck! Me, Emily, would I even be able to finish something like that? It's incredible to think about. I would probably run it in 5 or 6 HOURS....HOURS!!! That's insane! So why do I have that goal?

I want to prove to myself that I'm stronger than I think. I want to have confidence (and a nice body) so that I'm not scared or jealous of other girls. My whole life I've been extremely jealous! I thought it'd be better after being married, but it's worse. (sorry honey) I want to feel amazing. (I also like to hear how amazing it is to run a marathon...so yes, part of it is bragging rights. Can you blame me? :)

How do I keep myself going? How do I ignore my mind when it's saying "just quit" "it's too hard" "someone will always be better/look better than you"

That's EXACTLY why I want to keep going! I want to feel beautiful. And for me that means having low body fat and muscles. I can do it! I will do it!

I texted my sister before writing this to see if I was crazy about wanting to run a half marathon in April. She said I could totally do it and look how far I've come in ONE month of running. I can now run 4 miles! FOUR MILES! Where as a month ago...I couldn't run ONE mile! Think about what I can do in 5 months! (that's when the half marathon is)

I'm so ready to move out of this chapter in my life. The chapter where I'm a fatty mom and lazy. I got rid of my facebook almost 4 months ago and then started getting addicted to pinterest and blogging. There's always something, right? But my sweet husband showed this clip to me the other night. Take a few minutes to watch it. I cried. A lot.

I love love love this message! This was totally me. Pushing away my family just to read my 400+ friend's status updates on facebook or looking to see who posted what on pinterest/blogger. I'm tired of wasting my life away. Tired of feeling like the time is slipping out of my hands and regretting it! I've made a commitment to only get on the internet with my girls are sleeping (I like to wake up before them), napping or after they've gone to bed. It's nice. 

Anyway, kind of got off topic. But in reality, if you do sit on the computer a lot during the day, I challenge you to get off and get outside. Go run. Start slow. My first 2 weeks I ran 1 minute, walked 1 minute for 20 minutes and then slowly increased my running time. (with that, I only ran maybe a mile with the 20 minutes.)

One last thing, I've decided to start running in the mornings now. Most my races are in the morning so I figured it might be better to train at that time. With that, I have to push a double stroller. 50 pounds + of children weight. It can be done and that stroller is only going to help in the long run. 

I really hope I can inspire people to get out and run. Especially Mom's. Being a mom is the hardest job and being a fatty mom makes it worse. Get your kids in a stroller and get out! I recommend running with a jogging stroller, HUGE difference. But get this, my jogging stroller...I got for $30 off craigslist! Don't need a nice, new EXPENSIVE stroller to get it done. Just FYI. :) 

p.s. I LOVE hearing from you guys! I've gotten texts and emails and it motivates me! Thanks for all the love!

Tracking my workouts

I figured I need a spot to keep track of what I do for my workouts. What better than to keep track on my blog! Duh me! haha


So I mentioned yesterday about my running workout I'm doing. 3 days a week. Day 1 a normal running day, day 2 a slower but longer run and day 3 shorter but faster. 


Monday 11/7 - Ran 2.5 miles (no breaks) in 29 minutes. 
Tuesday 11/8 - Weights with Turbo Jam. 8lbs when doing lower body and 5lbs for upper body. 


I also bought one of these...

Mine's blue though

It's called a foam roller. And it's used to massage your muscles. I used it back in high school when I was working out with my coach to increase my vertical. They had them at the gym and we would use them before working out. Awww...it felt so good! There are a bunch of videos on youtube on how to use this. It's simple and it really does feel like a great deep tissue massage. And yes, soreness will follow so drink lots of water! 

I am signing up for another 5k run December 17th. Does anyone want to join me?! It's $20 until the first of December and then $25 after that. It's at Victory Lanes...ride behind Water World/Wet N' Wild. Jingle Bell Run! Seriously let me know if anyone wants to join me! 

5k #2

7am

50 degrees

windy

overcast

freezing cold...to say the least!

Not my ideal weather for running, especially since all my training was in 80+ degree weather. NOT FUN! But I did it. And beat my previous time...by 10 seconds. 

After running the race, I was pretty ticked. My time sucked, my muscles were frozen...I started my period....ya...not a good day. Not much else to say about it. It was cold. HARD. And my sweet husband couldn't run due to his allergy to the cold. A whole other story, but he decided to not run.

Anyway, after beating myself up over this race for a day, I realized it wasn't that big of a deal. I still completed it. And most importantly, I have still keep the weight and inches off that I've lost from training. So what's a time? It's all good. Especially when I was getting ready for church and I bravely decided to try on a skirt I haven't been able to wear for 2 years, without a bella band or the button unbuttoned...I bought it a long time ago and kept it cuz I liked it. As I put it on and buttoned it...it was BIG on me! I felt so awesome. 

I have been running now for a month and I feel awesome. I haven't weighed or measured recently but that's fine. I like how I look in the mirror and more importantly how I feel. A month ago I was a size 12/14. (I was still wearing my maternity pants actually...I don't like the feeling of having a muffin top while standing. Sitting down...I can be OK with it...but not standing, YUCK!) So I never switched over to "real" pants. I am now in a size 8/10 depending on the brand. I tried some Lucky pants on, size 8, and they were huge. So...it all depends. My size 10 jeans I bought from target a month ago now don't fit me. Luckily they were on sale. But now I look like a scrub with baggy pants. Maybe in a week or so I'll go find some more sales and get new pants...it's getting cold. Today it hasn't gotten over 60 degrees and is overcast, windy and rainy. Jeans are a must! I actually need to get  a few tops too...mine are small. Man, I tell you! After a month of working out and I'm getting these kind of results! I absolutely love this! Putting my clothes on in the morning keeps me motivated for sure! 

On to my week's workouts! I've found an awesome website with awesome information on running. Runner's World. Searching around on there after my girls are asleep I have found lots of wonderful information. This week's workouts I'm increasing my weight with my weight training and I'm increasing the miles I run. I have been averaging around 9 miles a week and with a program I found each week I'll increase by 1 or 2. Intensity will also change. One day is normal, Second day faster. Third day slower but longer. I'm excited. I just wish it wasn't raining today so I could run today. Looks like it's Turbo Jam for me! :) 

I will most likely take more photos of my "after" (after a month of losing to compare) I'm a little more confident now so I think I will post. I'm not perfect. But I hope someone out there is reading my blog and is getting motivated! It's really simple! All I've done it cut out junk food, ate healthier, ran 3 times a week and did weights the other 3 days while resting on Sunday. Easy? Easy. Just have to do it! 

Fitting Into Pants!

The best feeling in the world is being able to fit into your clothes. At least for me that is. I was getting ready for my volleyball game last night and as I chose a pair of pants to wear, I sort of hesitate because I couldn't even fit into them before I was pregnant with Mylee. As I pulled them up and buttoned them....they were loose! I have a problem with pants being too snug around me and cutting me off when I'm standing up. I know I'll have some skin hanging over when I sit, but it's when I'm standing I don't want the pants feeling tight. I was very VERY happy with this. I haven't been able to weigh myself recently....my daughter was jumping on the scale and it broke....oh well..probably a good thing. I don't know if I'm dropping much weight or just toning, but I definitly feel I'm losing somewhere. I love it! This week I ran 8 miles and did some weights. Today is my day off because tomorrow I have another 5k! I'm very excited but also nervous because I worked really hard this week. Hopefully my break today will help my body recover.

Next week I plan to up my workouts. I've been doing weights Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday but I feel I need to increase the weights now. And then I run Monday, Wednesday and Friday. I need to come up with a plan for my running so I can increase my endurance, Maybe sprints on one day, long run on another day and something different that last day. Not quit sure yet. If anyone is reading this blog...any suggestions would be cool :)

Problem Areas?

I have several problem areas. I gain weight in my upper arms and upper thighs first before everywhere else. After my 2 pregnancies, I started having problems with that ugly stuff called cellulite. Know what that is? Yuck. It's ugly and I've never had it before! So...after 3 years of having ugly thighs, I researched how to get rid of cellulite. There are creams and massages and what not's for it. But I didn't want to buy anything. So, I kind of lost hope and just forgot about it. Until today. I looked in the mirror while wearing short shorts (one's that only me, myself and I see) and I noticed most of the cellulite was gone. I got excited! I then came and asked my husband if he saw a difference and he too said that my legs where looking nicer! I loved hearing that! I love seeing results and having someone else see the results too!

Anyway, I'm upping my running tomorrow. I have a friend who is training for another half marathon and I wanted to start training with her...hopefully I won't slow her down! We are starting with 4 miles tomorrow! I'm sort of excited! The most I've ran to date is 3.1 miles...two times!  I love running and I love how it makes me feel!

Candy Free Weekend!

Well, I achieved my goal! Even though today is Halloween, we had our church's trunk or treat on Friday night. So we had candy since then and I have not had one piece! Add in a few Halloween parties with even more goodies and a mother who was taunting me with a cookie...yumm....but I didn't have one! haha Kind of silly but it was a sincere goal I wanted to reach and I did it! Now to continue to NOT eat the candy that will remain in my house for who knows how long! Maybe I'll re-gift it or something! :)

Anyway, my awesome husband bought me some awesome shoes!

Aren't these so ugly?? haha I was thinking to dress up as a Ninja Turtle for Halloween and wear these! That's what I feel like when I wear them! I really love them though. They do feel so natural and barefoot it's unreal. I'm slowly transitioning into them. If you go straight to wearing only these, you can hurt muscles and what not...I don't want that especially since it's just my beginning of all this workout running stuff. Anyway, these shoes were $100 and I totally think they are worth it. I'll update more about these and the benefits as I see them!

I am also signing up for my first 10k either in December or January! I can't decide yet! The one in December is a 12k which is a mile-ish longer than a 10k. Decisions, decisions!

Happy Halloween!

HALLOWEEN!

The title of my blog is "Craving Chocolate" my biggest weakness is candy! Any kind really. With Halloween coming, I am extremely nervous. Kendal will be tick or treating and all her candy will just be sitting in the house for who knows how long. I have another 5k in one week and I am determined to get a better time so maybe that will keep me away from the candy. But...I could just sneak a piece here and there. NO ONE will know. 


I am on pinterest and I love it. Especially the fitness section because there are so many sayings that help motivate me. This one specifically...

"What you eat in private, you wear in public."

Doesn't that just hit you in the gut? I repeat that several times a day to myself. What you eat in private, you wear in public. It doesn't matter if someone sees you eating that candy bar....but you sure will have a harder time losing that weight! 

I love how motivated I am recently to lose weight work out. My mind set has changed from getting that number on the scale down to 125lbs to feeling great and looking great. Although, that number does matter, just doesn't seem to be as big as how I feel. I feel amazing right now....but the looking great...not so much. I definitely won't be going out in my sweet spandex like I used to do in my high school years. But I'll get there. 

I posted this so I can hold myself accountable for doing what I say. 

My goal for this Halloween weekend is to not eat any candy, cake, cookies or anything else of the sorts. I can do it. I've done it for a week now. What's one weekend...full of...nice....chocolate-y...yummy...candy.....yummm......

I CAN DO IT! I'm going to. 

5k

As I posted on my family blog, Tanner and I ran our first 5k on October 22nd. It was amazing. I have never been a long distance runner, but after the race I totally want to push to do a 10k. Running really helps me emotionally. Depression runs in my family, as I've learned. I suffered from it after my oldest was born. Two years of it really did some magic to me. I look in the mirror and I don't know who I am. It's a hard life. I've become very angry and even today suffer mildly from the depression. But I notice that when I do run, I feel so much better.

I'm amazed that I actually ran the whole 3 miles. I'm 20 pounds over weight and no strength. Honestly, I'm so motivated by the fact I ran the race. Mainly because if I could run those 3 miles in the shape I am in, what could I do when I am in better shape? With a little weight training and more running, who knows, maybe I could run an actual marathon. It's something to strive for. I feel good. Feel better than I have in a LONG time. (I just this summer heat would leave so I could run in the morning. Not at 6am or 6pm. Yes, it's still upper 90's here. Except today...75 baby and overcast! Oh I live for days like today!)

With this being said I think it's time to share my weight and measurements. (Maybe photos. But I'm in spandex and a sports bra....a little embarrassing.) But when I look at those photos I can already see a difference. Feels so good.

Stats from September 30th

Weight: 148
Tummy: 37in
Hips: 41in
Inner Thigh: 25in  (That's where I hold most my weight)

October 26th

Weight: 140
Tummy: 34in.
Hips: 40in
Inner Thigh: 24in.

I find it amazing how much I lost in a month when I was really inconsistent with working out. Again, imagine how much more I can lose when I am working out daily like I want. AND eating healthy. This last month I was not eating well at all! Lots of chocolate and ice cream and eating out. It's been a week since I've had soda, fast food, candy, junk...so hopefully more weight will drop with me eating better. I'm not so concerned about the number on the scale but more how I feel and look. And so far I have gained a ton more confidence because to me, I look and feel better!

(Insert photos here)

I don't think I'm ready to post pics yet. Although I'm sure no one reads this...it is an open blog. Anyone can view it.


So maybe soon...but for now here is my workout I've been doing this week.

Monday, Wednesday, Friday: Running. I ran 1 mile on Monday, mainly cuz it was dark and I was alone. Tonight I plan on running with a friend and we plan on running 3 miles.

Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday: Weight training. I have Turbo Jam and I do the Turbo Sculpt. It's a 35 minute full body work out. I LOVE.

Sunday's are my day of rest :)

Huge Accomplishment First 2 miler!

Last week sometime, Tanner and I went running together. I normally run 2 minutes walk 1 minutes for 2 miles. Well, he and I have a 5k on Saturday so we thought we'd push ourselves a little. So we ran a full mile with no breaks. It was hard. I was dragging my feet the last quarter mile. Almost wanting to stop, but I saw Tanner in front of me so I couldn't stop. He'd tease me later. Anyway, we finished it together, than walked back home.

Well....last night I got a little confidence. On my run I decided to just TRY running the full two miles with out breaks. The first mile was surprisingly very easy. Helps that I had a wonderful ipod with great music to listen to. Really helped. As I turned to run back, I was feeling really good. Then I got to the half way point. Maddox, is the street name. Once I crossed the street all I could think of was reasons to STOP. Oh, no one's here to watch what I do. No one cares. No one....blah blah blah. NO ONE...who cares what they think. It's me and me only. I'm the fatty out of shape mommy of 2. Not everyone else. So...with a change of a song I picked up my pace as fast as I could and I fought hard to finish. As I hit the 2 mile marker I did a little celebration! It was dark out so no one could really see me. A few tears were shed and a few sweet dance moves busted out. I felt so good. So proud of myself. Never I have ran 2 miles. Always did the one mile runs in weight training. It felt even better knowing that. Yes....my time was a little long. I ran it in 25 minutes. But it's not too horrible for the first time.

I am going to push myself to run that every other day. On the days I don't run, I do weights. I did weights today and boy it felt great! Now, we'll see if I have anything left for my sand volleyball games tonight. YIKES!

I need to post about my before's still. I'm waiting cuz I'm kind of embarrassed. It's probably not a big deal because I just created this blog and I'm sure I don't have any followers. But still...give me a week and I'll post my before stats...probably not photos :)



I don't know how many times I repeated this quote on my run :)

Losing Weight

Well, I set off on an adventure a while ago to lose weight. As all things I do....that stopped. Sort of. I've been running at least 3 times a week. A total of 10 miles. Run/Walk. But I think if I tracked myself better, I'd try harder. I have already lost 10 pounds and have another 15 I want to lose. They say my ideal weight for by type is 135pounds. I'm 5 pounds (8lbs, depending on the day) away from hitting that. But I think I can lose more...let's reach for the stars :) Tanner and I wanted to do this thing called Tough Mudder....it was too expensive and after Christmas I don't think we'd be able to afford it. So instead we are doing some 5k's and other random things. I know there are a lot of weight loss blogs out there but this is mine. I'm hoping it'll help me stay on track.

I'll post some photos and measurements in a while when I get brave enough to do so. I want to be completely honest in this so that I can track perfectly what I'm doing. For now this is the introduction. A stay at home mom who gain unwanted weight due to depression and pregnancies. Tag along with me and share your journey as well.